Teens: Here’s How to Build Your Self-Esteem

One of the most challenging experiences in life, no matter what age you are, is experiencing a low self esteem. Because everything depends on how you value and see yourself. For instance, if you see yourself as a competent, intelligent, kind, and socially acceptable person, then it’s going to be easy to get along with others and progress in life. However, if you see yourself as shameful, incompetent, unintelligent, and worthy of rejecting, then it’s going to be challenging to get along with others and succeed.


There are many factors that go into a teen’s self-esteem. These include:

  • The self esteem of a teen’s parents
  • Early experiences that might have contributed to how a teen values him or herself today
  • A teen’s relationship with their parents
  • General disposition, such as being more introverted or extroverted
  • Whether or teen feels valued by his or her family members


These are some simple contributing factors to one’s self-esteem. However, there might be other reasons that apply to you and your life. If you experience a low self-esteem and you notice that it’s affecting your social life, relationships, performance at school, or relationship with yourself, you might try the following suggestions as a means to boost your self-esteem.


  • Explore your thoughts. Sometimes thinking can become harmful. There are patterns of thought that can help create a low self esteem over time. What’s great about recognizing these patterns is that it provides an opportunity to change them. If you see any harmful thoughts in yourself, you can begin to work on actually thinking differently, especially in certain circumstances that might make you question your self-worth.
  • Figure out your strengths and weaknesses. Knowing what your strengths are can add to a sense of feeling good about yourself. Knowing your weaknesses can be just as important. When faced with a difficult task, for example, instead of pretending to know how to get it done and then fail (which can dampen your self-esteem), you can ask for help or simply admit that you don’t have that skill. Admitting your weaknesses is in itself a certain kind of strength.
  • Don’t compare yourself to others. Although comparing ourselves to others is easy to do, especially when we don’t have faith in our own lives, this is the first thing that weakens self-esteem. There’s only one life to live and that’s yours. Taking responsibility for it is the best way to build self-confidence.
  • Trust your own feelings. This is hard to do when you might have been taught that your feelings are not worth trusting. Often, we are taught to trust reason and logic instead. However, feelings are a certain kind of intelligence that can lead to building self-trust which in turn can boost self-confidence.


These are a few tips for improving the way you feel about yourself. You might find that you can’t make these changes on your own. If that’s the case and you want assistance, try working with a therapist – particularly one that serves teens. You might find that he or she makes a world of difference in your life.